the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
