Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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