I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.