Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
