Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
