I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize