Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
