the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize