is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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