Please, let me fuck your mom
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
