I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
pray to the hookup gods
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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