YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
