I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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