Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I want a musical about memes.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize