Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us