There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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