Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
