Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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