i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
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