Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Randomize
