exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
