Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
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