careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
