Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis