you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize