47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I would fuck him just for his dog
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
