the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize