Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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