I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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