I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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