Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I found somebody to have a 3 sum with

  (586): View more from Michigan

  shutup! Who?!?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Hahaha April fools!

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  (248): I found somebody to have a 3 sum with (586): shutup! Who?!? (248): Hahaha April fools! http://tfl.nu/w7zs
  Replies (12) Good night (1149) Bad night (1764)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.

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  (305): We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction. http://tfl.nu/e3vr
  Replies (33) Good night (962) Bad night (5721)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.

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  (206): he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff. http://tfl.nu/ss2c
  Replies (13) Good night (9428) Bad night (885)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.

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  (613): If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough. http://tfl.nu/noke
  Replies (8) Good night (1347) Bad night (3671)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night

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  (404): Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night http://tfl.nu/nrlr
  Replies (12) Good night (7236) Bad night (1048)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.

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  (678): If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me. http://tfl.nu/3kcp
  Replies (5) Good night (1504) Bad night (1851)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.

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  (816): He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock. http://tfl.nu/m79f
  Replies (5) Good night (2548) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.

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  (845): Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight. http://tfl.nu/mc2w
  Replies (2) Good night (2145) Bad night (888)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally

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  (203): i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes (203): i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally http://tfl.nu/ln5z
  Replies (3) Good night (846) Bad night (917)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life

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  (603): Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life http://tfl.nu/vchk
  Replies (3) Good night (792) Bad night (662)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.

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  (319): More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy. http://tfl.nu/fj2g
  Replies (2) Good night (1098) Bad night (585)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.

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  (406): There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing. http://tfl.nu/ymyj
  Replies (0) Good night (803) Bad night (392)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL

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  (330): easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL http://tfl.nu/8uqk
  Replies (4) Good night (914) Bad night (426)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO

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  (713): My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO http://tfl.nu/1per
  Replies (1) Good night (747) Bad night (472)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.

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  (704): no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot. http://tfl.nu/ubnf
  Replies (2) Good night (860) Bad night (290)

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