STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.