drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
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So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
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