my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize