Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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