im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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