Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
