It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
