please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
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