i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
