Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
