He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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