bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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