hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
