College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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