When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize