They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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