Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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