when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Randomize
