took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize