remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
