I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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