After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
